Episode Transcript
[00:00:25] Speaker A: Hi, I'm Vicki Wright Hamilton, and welcome to Ignite.
Are you ready to spark your passion and fuel your leadership journey?
This is where ambition meets action and transformation truly begins. Let's light the fire and keep it burning. I am so happy to have my guest back again today. She truly lights the fire and keeps it burning. Deirdre Breckenridge, welcome to the show. I am so happy to have you. For those who are not familiar, she is the CEO of Pure Performance, and she is one that is about an expert when it comes to emotional intelligence, communication, the importance of truly having a good life, if you will. When you start talking about that communication balance. Welcome, Deirdre. Glad to have you.
[00:01:26] Speaker B: Thank you, Vicki. Great to be here. Thanks for having me on your show again.
[00:01:30] Speaker A: Oh, no problem. I tell you, my audience, this is going to enjoy you this time as much as they have before us. I have always enjoyed your content, your solutions, and the things that we can do to make things happen. So I appreciate that. Well, thank you. I want to start a little bit about when we start talking about authentic relationships. And, you know, we're beginning 2025, and you've got a lot of people out there who have businesses, who are leaders, who are really trying to start the new year the right way. And I'd love for you to give our audience an understanding of how do you really build these authentic relationships and what steps can they take to ensure that these business relationships are meaningful?
[00:02:24] Speaker B: Well, first off, there's such an opportunity to build relationships, but you have to put in love into the relationship. If you think about it, what you put in is what you get out. And that means being fully present and giving of yourself. And I think that's where all the distractions that are around us today pull us out of conversations. And we're not really there and we're not listening. And it starts with listening, Vicki. And if you're listening and there's plenty of models that we can discuss, then you're getting to know somebody and you can help them and be giving of yourself.
[00:03:06] Speaker A: Do you have any listening models you would love to recommend to the audience or talk about that would allow us the opportunity to begin that process?
[00:03:15] Speaker B: Yes. So I have a favorite, a new favorite. It's the SEER model. So that's S, I, E, R. And it starts with sensing. So that that's the S. And rather than just listening to build the relationship and continue a conversation, you're sensing with you're. You're listening to the tone of somebody's voice, the way they inflect maybe the words that they're using, how what's their body language and taking it. And at that point you can move to the I, which is interpret. And now you get to decipher. This is an important part you're analyzing. What is it that they want you to know? Is it what they care about, what they're interested in, what concerns them? So you can move to the E, which is evaluate. And at that point, you have to check your bias because it's there, and then also apply your logic and really the significance, what is significant about this, so that you can respond with mutual understanding. And when you respond, if you use that listening model, you're also able to be a little bit more vulnerable. And that's what it also takes to build trust in a relationship.
[00:04:29] Speaker A: Well, you know, I want to expand on that model a little bit because I think what you're bringing up are some very critical areas that are important. When we start talking about listening and you said something that was very key, check your bias. Right. How are we sure that as we're moving forward, we're not prejudging or that we are not letting our past really impact what's going on so that we think we're listening, but we're really hearing?
[00:05:01] Speaker B: Yes. And we all have bias. One thing that you can start doing is asking more questions. When you ask more questions, you're going to get a better understanding. And far too often, what ends up happening, we tend to look for what makes us feel better and what resonates. And that's our confirmation bias. We seek it all the time. Rather than just taking in information that makes you feel good, take the opposite and ask questions to expand your knowledge and to open up your perspective. And I'd say that that's step number one.
[00:05:41] Speaker A: You know, I agree with that. And as you're talking about really looking at being open and really understanding and listening and those kinds of things, I'm sure that through your work and through your people that you have spoken to and you've been coaching and working with, etc. That there are some common mistakes that people make when they're trying to build this trust and trying to move their businesses forward. Can you talk about some of those mistakes and what we can do to overcome them? Especially as everybody's trying to do what, drive in 2025. Right. Move that business up and get more of that business. But anything you can give us along those lines.
[00:06:29] Speaker B: Sure. First off, you have to make sure you're reliable in a relationship. Somebody can count on you. That's a building block to trust. You also have to make sure you're credible, that you're telling the truth, you're honest, and you have ethical communication. You also want to make sure that there's a level of intimacy, meaning that you know about the person that you're building the relationship with. You don't know it all. You can't make assumptions. And the more you listen and learn, the better off you're going to be. And yes, empathy does play a part. And then you also have to keep your self orientation low. In other words, when you want to build a relationship, it has to be that it's mutual. It can't be all about what you're trying to get out of the relationship. And that's where people fall short.
[00:07:22] Speaker A: Tell me a little bit more, can you share some examples of that?
[00:07:26] Speaker B: Sure. Even just when you're seeking out a new client prospects, you're at an event and you meet somebody for the first time and you're jumping into business so quickly, first of all, they don't know anything about you. It's that self first. I want to get to the possibility that maybe I'm going to get this person. I can email them and then maybe have a meeting or have a lunch. That's moving too quickly. You're missing all the opportunities, even just to learn and find out and to.
[00:07:59] Speaker A: Have that intimacy piece, you know, I'm going to play a little bit of devil's advocate with you. One of the things that I remember as being a V very, very busy executive, you know, and I had peers and I had peers that were like, you better not come in here selling me begin. You better get to know me, blah, blah, blah, blah. I was so focused on what I did. It was like, you don't have to come in here and try to play nice. You don't have to come here and all of that. I just need you to come in and tell me how you gonna help me. It's really all about me and how you gonna help me, right? How are you gonna help me get my goals? Is it going to be an increase in productivity? Is going to be increase in revenue? Is it? You're going to help me get something done fast. I just want the facts and to the point. And so I struggled as an executive because I wasn't about those relationships. And it used to drive me crazy when salespeople call, oh, hi, how time for small talk. What is it that you want? What can I do for you? And let's get it done. And deciphering that when you're building relationships with people, I have found to be extremely important. Now I will say that as a business owner, one of the things I do is when I go after clients is I try to understand are they more of an introvert, more of an extrovert, how do they really do things? What are the words that they're using on their LinkedIn on articles and all of that. So I can understand if their relationship. So I know that I need to go in and build a relationship. But it's such a hard thing when you're at networking events and you're talking, it's like, yeah, if I just exchange a card with you and I'm just having casual conversation, will you really remember me? And are we really building starting a relationship? Because you really just have a connection at that point and it's really about that person remembering you. Any advice you can give on deciphering those two.
[00:09:57] Speaker B: So you have to be on your toes. There's no doubt about it. When you meet somebody who wants to get down to brass tacks, then go there. But think about it's still a part of the equation. Vicki, you're pretty much saying that that person better have low orientation. That self orientation has be super low. Me, me, me, me, me. And they just have to get that they might meet somebody. I remember, I think it was one of the guys on the all in podcast, I don't remember which one saying that when he does goes to events, the last thing he wants to do is talk about his job. He doesn't want to talk about that. That he'd much rather talk about interesting subjects. And that's how you get to know him. He's a venture capitalist. That's the way that he's going to be and you just have to recognize it. I think the formula is different for everybody. And if you're good at what you do and you're a good communicator, you will pick up on that.
[00:10:57] Speaker A: And I couldn't agree with you more because I think everybody is an individual and if you give them what they need, how they want to be treated, what's given to them, you have more likelihood of a success. And I will tell you, as I started as an entrepreneur, it was a quick lesson that I'd learned. Everybody wasn't like me. Get to the point. Let's get it done. Even though I built relationships as I was going along and had great relationships, but I learned the importance of really doing my homework and that's what caused me to do the homework so I could be more, have more emotional intelligence as I move forward. We're going to take a station break. We'll be back. I can't wait to continue this conversation because I really want to get into how we're navigating communication in the digital age. We'll be right back.
Welcome back, dear. You know, this is such an interesting conversation and I'm loving, you know, understanding all the perspectives and thank, thank you so much for your formula on listening. I'm gonna have to, I'm gonna be using that. I appreciate that information. So, audience, if you missed the last segment, you definitely wanna go back and listen to it. But I'd like to really further our conversation as we're getting more and more into the digital age. And you referenced some of this, you know, earlier as we were speaking and talking about adapting our communication styles and how we're really putting the phone everywhere and being on top of all of this and those kinds of things. As we are moving forward, we know that the digital age can make us feel overwhelmed, can keep us to the point that we have so many platforms of information and data and places that we can go and truly understanding what should really be our self expectations when it comes to the learning and the data and platform as we're moving forward. I'd love to hear your perspective on what strategies can really help our professionals and leaders manage this communication effectively. When we have so many different channels that we need to communicate through.
[00:13:55] Speaker B: Yes, there are a lot of channels, but just because there are so many doesn't mean you have to be everywhere. And I think that's what you have to step back as a part of your strategy to say where do our customers need us to be? Where do they expect us to be? Where do they want us to be? And those are the places that you're going to build out. But before you can even get to strategy, what are your goals? Think about what are we trying to achieve. Every platform is different. They have, platforms have different cultures and ways that you engage and that's going to definitely have an impact on how you develop moving forward and either work or engage or whether it's contests, campaigns, what you're doing with your community. I would also say that do a bit of listening because when you're listening and Vicki, I think we've talked about this before, when you listen, you begin to understand what your customers care about and what they need and you'll develop the content, the information, the programs and exactly what ignites their Passion. And those are just some of the ways that you can be more strategic.
[00:15:08] Speaker A: You know, And I agree. I think it's important that as we start talking about passion, and that's one I could talk about all day long, right? Is that passion and that purpose. Because when you reach somebody in the heart and you're getting to that passion, it's something that they're looking forward to and they want to talk about, they want to be involved in, they want to hear more about, you know, in terms of moving forward. And I think that's what starts the. From a connection to a relationship where I really want to learn more about you, to see how you're going to be, how we can facilitate potentially working together, doing things together, being a partner. Maybe it's a business partnership, you know, kind of thing as we move forward. So I do appreciate that and understand it. But you said something I really want to expand on a little bit, and it's one of my favorite words.
You said each platform and channel has a culture.
Can you define a little bit more about what you mean as a culture on these channels? Because I think that is extremely important as we start to talk about communication.
[00:16:21] Speaker B: Well, think about the different channels. Look at LinkedIn. LinkedIn is your business, professional, community. The way that you act on LinkedIn, the way that you connect from the ways you create content, how you comment, that's very different than, let's say, what you see on X or what you see on Instagram. That's all a part of the culture. Culture is the way that people participate, and you have to be tapped into that. If you come onto LinkedIn and you're sharing as if you're on Instagram or TikTok, you're not going to develop business relationships the way that you would like to. People expect content a certain way, thought leadership, and that's a great platform for thought leadership.
[00:17:11] Speaker A: How do you validate that culture? How do you ensure, you know? And the reason I ask that is I think one of the complexities is starting to happen as we begin to talk about so many platforms and so many channels is, well, should I put a video on LinkedIn, should I not? And is video really just for Instagram, or should I be doing posts and what kind of ads do I really use? And even though my ads are targeted towards business and impacts the business on LinkedIn, you know, can I be myself? Can I be authentic in terms of, you know, being all of me, bringing all of me, you know, to the table as I move forward? What does that look like, and understanding, you know, X, how much is on X? Because you see everybody across these same platforms, right? The same person is on all five platforms. So it almost feels schizophrenic sometimes when it's like, okay, I'm going to communicate this message, right? And I want to talk about X on LinkedIn. I'm gonna say it this way on Facebook, I'll do it this way on X, I'm gonna do it this way. On Instagram, I'm gonna do it this way. But I think that confusion that's there, you know, in terms of the way we communicate. So how do you think we should talk to the same people across these different channels, but they have different cultures.
[00:18:37] Speaker B: Well, here's the thing. Is it always the same people? You wouldn't necessarily. Maybe. I know for myself, I'm on LinkedIn, but I'm not on TikTok, I'm not on Snapchat. So you have to remember who is the bulk of your audience and what are you trying to achieve on LinkedIn versus another platform? Maybe Instagram is more for your fun contests and your shorter videos and stories, but on LinkedIn, you have a great opportunity for a newsletter and longer content. And you can embed video in your newsletter, but you can't do anything if you're not, number one, if you don't know your goals and you're not measuring back to your goals. You had said, well, do I put a video here? Do I not put a video on LinkedIn? You kind of have to test a little bit to see what works. And if video works, then go with what's working. And also, your community is very quick to tell you what they like and what they don't like. So you want to make sure that you're tuning in and finding out what they need from you. So that's number one. You also mentioned, do I just come? Can I be myself? You should be yourself. Wherever you show up. Who you are on any one of your social channels should be the same person that someone meets in person in real life. And I think that authenticity should always shine through.
[00:20:07] Speaker A: So let's take that question. And I got to ask you this, especially when we talk about emotional intelligence, if I change my language, per the platform that I'm on, to address the potential audience of that culture of platform, am I being authentic?
[00:20:28] Speaker B: So you have to repeat the first part of what you said. If I change my.
[00:20:33] Speaker A: I lost a word, my language, my communication, my language based upon the culture of the platform, talked about LinkedIn as professional. I'm going to use a certain language when I'm on it. Instagram may be fun, I'm going to be a certain language. But am I still being authentic?
[00:20:53] Speaker B: Is it you?
In other words, do you like to have fun when you're on Instagram? If you like to have fun, it's you. If you talk in the professional business setting a certain way, whether you're on LinkedIn or you're at a conference, it's still you. So I think you are adjusting how you show up. It's still you and you're using the content that's appropriate for the community and the culture.
[00:21:21] Speaker A: I'm so glad you said that. I think more, more and more people need to hear that because I couldn't agree with you anymore. Just because we're adjusting our content to the appropriate audience doesn't mean we're not being real. It doesn't mean we're not being authentic. You're just addressing the level of the content that that audience may want to hear or take in or it's going to matter to them as they're continuing to move forward. So I am so glad you said that and I was hoping that's what you were going to say because I think more and more people need to hear it. You know, they begin, you know, I've had clients that say, well, I'm not really being, maybe I'm not using my emotional intelligence the right way, maybe I'm not being empathetic the right way. And I just think that you can speak to everybody with what resonates with them. Be authentic, be empathetic. You know, have high emotional intelligence as you're moving forward and understand people doesn't mean that you're, you're not you.
[00:22:29] Speaker B: Right? And also as a part of emotional intelligence that has to do with your own self awareness, are you aware of your emotions and how you, what you say could impact the people around you, especially on social media. And if you're not aware of your own emotions, how can you possibly manage somebody else's? And then there's also self regulation and that's the big one that I think everybody should think about. Do you have discipline on social media when you're on X, are you just shooting off how you feel or can you take a pause and really step back and maybe think about something a different way before you hit that send? Because once it's out there, oh, it travels very quickly.
[00:23:15] Speaker A: I hear you completely understand.
Do you think emotional intelligence truly plays a role in successful digital communication today?
[00:23:25] Speaker B: Oh, I do I think it transfers over. And I think leaders can show emotional intelligence, whether it's in a post on x, it's a LinkedIn post, a photo that they want to share. You're just remembering that emotional intelligence is there. There's a lot that goes into it. Self awareness, self regulation, empathy. It's are you motivating for the right reasons? And lastly, social skills, building those relationships, managing people and being part of a community. That's productive.
[00:24:02] Speaker A: You know, it always makes me feel good when I finish speaking with you about all of the areas that you're talking about. And I think about the impact of generations that we're facing too, and how generations are evolving. What we had when I was a child, I had to do manually what they have today. It's all automated. So I really, really enjoy talking about the impact of really understanding the methods to use for communication. Deirdre, thank you so much for being on our show. And I can't wait to have more Deirdre on my next show because I always learn so very.
[00:24:49] Speaker B: Thank you, thank you, thank you. It was a pleasure.
[00:24:53] Speaker A: Oh, well, I'm sure my audience thought so too. And I look forward to seeing all of you on the next episode of Ignite, where we let the fire keep it burning. See you next time.
I'm so excited to have my regular guest. I told you, I just can't get enough of them. Mr. Ryan con back on the show. And as you all know, he was a police officer. He served, he did so much, and now he's into coaching and leadership and helping others. And his perspectives are just so profound. Every time I listen to him, I learn so much. And guess what? You will too. Today, he is truly gonna light your fire and keep it burning. Hey, Ryan.
[00:26:28] Speaker C: Well, howdy. Howdy. Glad to be back.
[00:26:31] Speaker A: Vicki, I'm glad to have you and I'm so glad you could join us again. I really want to focus on talking about the growth oriented mindset we're going into 2025. People are trying to figure out, how do I grow? What do I do? How do I get things going? How am I able to make it happen this year?
What should I be doing next? So I definitely am excited about having the opportunity to explore this with you. A lot of our audience as they're feeling stuck in their current situation and they feel like I want to grow in 2025. I definitely want to thrive in 2025. I feel stuck.
I'm a little bit stuck. I'm not sure exactly what to do.
So what are some of the small but impactful ways to start shifting toward that growth mindset. If I just felt like I'm stuck.
[00:27:38] Speaker C: And I'm not sure I love this question so much because a lot of who I am as a person and what I do both professionally and either of the businesses or as a coach or through my community is I almost have an obsession with trying to make myself better, make people around me better, just make conditions better for people. And this is a. A common problem. Everyone looks at themselves in the mirror and in some facet of life says, man, I should be doing better. Oh, I can be this, or I could lose weight, or I could get smarter. I could make more money, or I could be a better pet owner. Whatever it is, there are all these doubts that run through human minds all the time. And then we get in this rut, we get stuck. To point out your question, and the first thing that you can do to get yourself out from being stuck, think of this visual. Most people have probably at some point been stuck in the snow, stuck in the mud, something where your tires are spinning.
You cannot get out of that. You rock back and forth. You do all the things you can do from inside the vehicle. What do you truly need to get unstuck? You need somebody to get out of the car and push. You need a second person. So if you are stuck on your goals, your growth, mindset, your development of yourself, your business, your relationship, whatever it is, you need to share your vision of yourself with another person. After you share, clearly share that vision and get them brought into that vision. You have got to give them permission. You have to give them permission to be annoying, to poke and nudge and push you in the right direction. When you go to eat that little tub of ice cream, you have to give them permission to slap your hand and say, not today. You're working on your six pack, right? And. And you're gonna go and you're gonna bring somebody in there. So the only way you get stuck out of the mud is either got to call a professional tow truck, right? Or you got to get out and push. And so that's what you do. Share your vision and give them permission to be your annoying accountability partner.
[00:29:35] Speaker A: Now, you know what? You bring up something that I talk about. You know as well that I love that. And because I love your methodology, because I truly believe that we all need to have somebody. Every a coach needs a coach. Everybody needs a coach. Everybody needs a motivator. Everybody needs someone to be with them, because, let's face it, it's not easy. It's hard work. There's going to be ups and and downs and valleys and things we have to overcome. And I usually, you know, as I think about leadership, I think about your board of directors, those that are going to be sitting around the table that know you from many, many facets of your life. And they're there not to tell you did a good job because that's what they want, you want to hear. They're there to be honest, give you true feedback, tell you when you're not doing well, push you, guide you, lead you. Why? Because they care about you. They love you and they care about you. So to your point, getting that person to push that car, they really want to help you. They really want to guide you. So I love that philosophy in terms of how we can make it happen and the things that we can do.
How does having the right mindset contribute to doing that? Productivity and success, even when you have others around you.
[00:30:57] Speaker C: So that that board of advisors, I always tell people I have these five advisors that every truly influential person must have. And so having that board of advisors is really important. But having the growth mindset is the first and foremost thing. So I have something called the 5M's that every successful business leader should have implemented and in place. And that starts with mindset. That is the first M. The mindset is to view yourself, your product, your service, your staff with value and purpose. I have value and I'm working towards a purpose. If I have the mindset that what I'm selling, doing or possessing has value to someone out there, I can now work to get that value to grow and get into more people's lives. Then I can sit here and I can find ways to grow my value physically. I'm on a scale of 1 to 10, I may only be a 3 right now, but I know that I'm at least a 3. And I can impact 30%. I want to impact 40, 50. I want to work myself up to a 9 and eventually a 10 in my impact that I have. So your mindset then sets the rest of your journey for you. Being able to develop materials and products and serve and services. It gets you the ability to go out and then gather materials and have methodology and set a method in place. This is how we're going to deliver our value, create our value and serve our products. And then you have to have the mentorship. I'm going to teach other people how to do the same thing, to be my replacement, to grow and further in their positions. And then you have the measured growth. We're going to measure all the time. We're not going to grow too fast. We're certainly not going to grow too slow. But we're going to measure and pace ourselves and set key indicators. By this time next year, you're going to have this certification, you're going to be in this role. You're going to serve this many clients. Our revenue is going to be here, and you set those things in place. But without a mindset of seeing yourself with value and purpose, none of that will come to fruition.
[00:32:58] Speaker A: You know, that's so true. And the other thing that I think as you, even as you were articulating that, as you look at that holistically, you know, we talk about, you know, helping individuals with growth and development. You know, it is so important. I don't care whether you work in a company, whether you have a steady job, just a regular. If, if you have a. A role, if you are managing people or not. But the one thing that we always have to think about is that succession plan. It could be the succession plan for what's going to happen even in my own household. Well, how are things going to progress? How am I putting things in place to prepare the next people, the next person that's in the house to continue to move forward? How are we growing, even personally, right. For ourselves? And how are we growing others? And I think it's so interesting when you make that parallel of mindset, because mindset goes both professionally and personally. We got to have the right mindset to evolve and to not be stuck, even if we feel stuck personally, right? You're. You got a family, you're trying to. You want to do some things, and you feel like we're just in routine, we're just in rut. How do I get out of that? So I'd love to get your perspective on getting out of that rut and that mindset, even when it's personal. How do you. How do you begin to grow and to develop? So you're getting that balance of professional and personal.
[00:34:41] Speaker C: On the personal level, again, I think there's a lot of overlap. So, again, still getting somebody in on your vision. Like, if I wanted to make some. What would seem like a drastic change of myself, I'd bring my wife in on it. Hey, hey, babe. I've been looking at doing these things. Can you help me? Here's the exact vision of how I see myself. Will you help me get there? Will you be my backstop so I don't slip and go Backwards and push me forward. The other thing is get somebody to go along that journey with you. Hey, I'm in a rut. And let's just keep, let's go along the physical. Hey, it's beginning of the year resolutions. Everybody wants to lose weight, get in shape, right? Let's just take that category and say, hey, I want to get like you're going to get, get a million times more success out of your exercise program if you're going to the gym with a partner. If you have a gym buddy and just waking up early in the morning and tying your shoelaces because your buddy's going to be at the gym waiting on you and you don't want to let them down, is a heavy, awesome weight that gets you motivated and in the gym. And not every workout is going to be your best workout. And yes, you will get sick. You will be on vacation. But guess what? Running and push ups and sit ups are free. So even though you're not lifting weights, you're out on there. You better be running up and down the beach, right? And so stop making the excuses, pre plan it and have it somebody to go along the journey with you. So not just the backstop partner, that's one. But have somebody side by side to go along the journey with you. Hey, I want to learn a second language. Let's learn French together, right? And start taking French lessons. And if you can get out of the rut by bringing somebody with you, they're going to be elevated as well. And so you can start layering these things now. Take that to the professional level. Hey, we want to be a million dollar business, a ten million dollar business, one hundred million dollar business, okay? Hey, buddy of mine that's in a different industry, let's hold each other accountable, let's push and let's make each other take those calculated risks that we're afraid of. And we're going to grow and we're going to be bazillionaires together, right? Take somebody along with you on that journey and it's going to be a lot more fulfilling of a journey as well.
[00:36:33] Speaker A: You know what, Ryan, you said, you said something that is, that's really resonating and is so powerful. It's always great when you take a partner with you, when you're working with someone, when you're side by side with someone to hold you accountable as you move forward. I'd love to get your perspective on an inspiring story that has inspired you of someone that really transformed their mindset and achieved their Great goals that they were looking to do.
[00:37:06] Speaker C: So I'll give you a great example of somebody that's in the process right now making great gains. So I've been arresting coach for about three and a half, four years now. And three years ago, there was a wrestler who just had the mindset, okay? And he had a lot of self doubt, wasn't having a lot of success, was an early wrestler in his career. When you're an early wrestler, you get your head kicked in a bunch, right? You lose, but you win what you can in the second year, hey, let's go second year, realist expectations. Let's have a better than.500 record. Let's just win more than we lose. And they did it. And then this year, let's be a force to dominate with. But in order to do that, you're gonna have to go lift weights, you're gonna have to change your diet, you're gonna get on top of your sleeping schedule, get rid of other distractions in your life. And we're gonna layer these things. We wrote them down. And he journaled and we journaled wrestling camps and new moves. And I said, you gotta get extra training in before practice. I tell these kids, if you show up to practice, you do everything that me and the other coaches on the staff tell you to do. We will make you good. And if you work really hard, we'll make you very good. But only you can make you great. Okay? And so you have to do the extras, the before, the after the diet, the sleep, the extra weight lifting, the extra conditioning, you have to do those things. I can make you really good if you give me your all, but only you can make you great. So this year he's 27 and 3 and he is a force to be reckoned with. And he's ranked number five in the state. Okay. And so we're looking at this year, state placing, next year state champion. And. And with that mentorship and that drive and that mindset and the plan and the path, he's having that success and he's doing all of the changes we mentioned on today's episode.
[00:38:40] Speaker A: Fantastic. What a great story to share. Because he stuck with it. He went through the trials and the tribulations to use it to grow. Oh, that was awesome, Ryan. I appreciate that. And something that we all can relate to as we continue to move forward. We're going to take a station break and we'll be right back. And Ryan, when we come back, I really want to talk about how do we turn these goals and the Real action. We'll be right back.
You know, Ryan, it's really as we start talking about mindset and we talk about reaching goals, some of us can have all of the desire. We got the dream, we've got the desire to really do it, but we're not really sure about the steps to get there and what to do. And we feel like this dream is so out of reach. I'm dreaming big. I got a big thing on my vision board. I'm working hard, I'm trying to put the mindset there, but I really cannot see how I'm going to reach it. It's just there is just sitting there in terms of moving forward. What's the best way to set goals that are both ambitious but achievable?
[00:40:42] Speaker C: So that, that is really a strong question. And you're asking something that echoes throughout everyone I talk to. At some point, I don't know where to start. And so I mentioned you had mentioned the term board of advisors and I have your five key advisors that everybody needs to have same thing, but one of them is called the experienced one. You need to attach yourself to somebody that has experience in the exact path or avenue that you're taking. So if you're an entrepreneur building a lawn mowing business, you better be talking to somebody that has the successful or has owned a successful lawn mowing business and they're going to tell you exactly what steps to take to be successful. If you're going to want somebody that's going to do a advisory based accounting firm, well, you better go talk to somebody that's successfully or has successfully run an advisory based accounting consulting firm. So the thing that you need to do is you need to target and pinpoint somebody that has experience and then you need to ask them a specific phrase and question an audience. Write this down. You say, when you have a conversation with this person, feel free to take them to lunch, feel free to sit down with them for just a moment and say, hey, I like the advice you've given me in the past. I admire you and the role and the success that you have accomplished. Would you consider being my mentor or would you consider being a mentor to me? That is an uncommon phrase and language that we use that will resonate with people big time. And everybody will probably be very humble. Be like, well, I don't know if I'm worthy of being a mentor. But you can explain to them that I just want to be able to pick your brain. I just want to be able to reference you. I want you to be able to look at me and say, hey Johnny, you're, you're doing this right? Or hey Johnny, you need to make a little correction here. Hey Sally, if you do this better right here, just keep going because 1, 2, 3, the dominoes are about, about to fall in your favor. I was there, I've walked the walk talk, the talk in your position. And if you just keep going, you're about to break through. And that experienced one can give you so much insight and they will tell you industry specific or lifestyle specific, your next step. Right. And that's, that's something that people don't recognize that I literally need to target somebody that has walked in the shoes I'm trying to walk in and not.
[00:42:53] Speaker A: Look at it as competition. Right. In terms of forward as you do it. But you know, one of the things that, you know as you talk about that I look at myself and even as a entrepreneur and thinking about my business and what I'm doing, I also think about the areas of my business and it's like I'm not going to be an expert at every single thing that we have to do. The accounting, the marketing to this, the that, all the things you need to do to be successful. I know where my lane is, I know where my talent is, I know where my lane is. So just as we look at those mentors, we also look at whether it's a coach, somebody who works with us, somebody who's an expert in that area, allow them to do some of those pieces where that expertise lies because they're going to do it faster, quicker and easy because it comes natural to them. It's something they don't have to really work at. Right. As you continue to move forward. So I really, truly appreciate that because as I look at myself, I go, you know what I tell one of my coaches in the, in one area that I'm working in, I'm like, you know what I'm trying to do? X I admire what you're doing and how you're getting there. And she's like, okay. And I said, but I need your help. I know my lane. I'm over here and not over here. And I need your help to get over there so that I could be successful. So I truly, it truly resonates with me and I appreciate that. But how do you stay motivated and focused when you're working toward long term goals? It's not just the immediate. It's, you know, we talk about a year, we talk about three year goals, five year goals, etc. How do you keep that motivation and focus to continue to move in that direction.
[00:44:40] Speaker C: I got you. So I am not a fan of motivation.
Motivation is temporary. Motivation is a roller coaster ride. Highly motivated today, you know, I don't feel like getting out of bed. Oh, I'm highly motivated. And. And motivation is temporary. What you, you don't need motivation. What you need is discipline. And discipline is that consistency. Discipline is those habits. Discipline is the understanding that today's short term action builds me that path towards the long term success. And so I really try to get people to. The excitement is what gets you the path. The excitement, the passion. The motivation is not what keeps you on the path. Right. You need discipline. Whether you're looking at a marriage, we're very excited in the honeymoon phase of marriage. But that's not what keeps you married. It's the discipline you put into your marriage, your business. It is super exciting to make that first sale and frame your dollar bill behind the cash register saying that this is the first dollar ever. So that is very exciting. But that is not what keeps you in business. When you get a lightning strike on your building and it fries your server, that is not what keeps you in business. When Covid closes the doors and you're scratching by. Discipline is what keeps you in the future. So discipline is the development of actionable steps, small actionable steps that can be repeated across the journey. It's the ability to constantly look at today's task, compare it to tomorrow's vision, and make sure that they're in alignment and then take the next step. The hardest part, like we talked about, working out in the last before commercial break, last segment, the hardest part of working out every morning is lacing your shoes in the morning. That's the hardest part. Once the shoes are laced and you're on your feet, well, you're going to the gym, you're going to get a workout, right? But getting your feet out of bed and getting those shoes on is the hardest part of any workout. And so discipline is the key. Action plans is the key. And putting them in small, then medium, then long term goals. Long term goals. I want to lose £15 in 45 days, right? But in order to do that, I've got to get today's workout in, today's meals under control. I've got to go do the whole week worth of meal prep. So there's my midterm goal. And make sure I eat all those meals and follow up. And I gotta avoid the cake at that birthday party, right? And I gotta, I gotta avoid the donuts that somebody just brought into, into work and I got to do those small action plans. That's discipline, not motivation.
[00:47:02] Speaker A: You know, I love that perspective. And as we start talking, we're talking about long term goals and I love that it sounds to me that what you're really saying to us is that you can have a long term goal, but break it up into sizable chunks that you can digest in terms of that long term goal and then make sure every chunk supports the next one in terms of getting where you are. And it's so true, because change happens. That's the only thing we can count on, right? The only thing, you know, that's going to happen is change. And so we have to be ready to make that change. We have to be ready to make things happen when that change is coming upon us, you know, as we're continuing to move forward.
So I definitely love that. You know, I used to always say motivate, nobody can motivate you. Motivation comes from within. And what you're really saying is exactly that motivation from within is the, is the, is being determined, having that, you know, having that determination and desire and, and wanting to move forward in discipline. So I love that discipline. I'm gonna have to use that. I'll give you credit for it, but I got to use it. Ryan.
I love it. I love it.
So I really would love to, you know, one of the things that people, as you're listening, talk about. You know, it's great to have all these theories, it's great to have all of these tips and things that are happening. But it doesn't really resonate till I hear something real that I can relate to that actually happened to you, that actually you actually went through, that you experience that you understand.
So that I get a real visibility of what it may look like. I'd love to example of what has helped you to turn a real goal into reality. That when you first started, you thought you would never ever see it. You thought you would never ever get there. And how specifically did you, what did you specifically do to achieve it?
[00:49:16] Speaker C: So, so that's a tricky question because I try not to set goals towards a vision that I don't think I'm not ever actually going to accomplish. But I will tell you one that got bigger than I thought it would. I knew I was going to be successful because I was going to put these dominoes in order and I was going to knock them over, by golly, okay. But it got bigger. So we had an opportunity with all this government changing all of the PPP, EIDLs, ERTCs, all the loans and all this kind of stuff that was all brand new, all brand new accountants like their, their tax code, we can go back to a book and there's always a checklist and an answer. And this was uncharted territory. And so I was fortunate enough to find myself into the category of Congress passed a new law that was related to taxes. Well, I can read taxes and I can read law. For my law enforcement career, my constitutional emphasis, bachelor's degree. Well, I can read this faster and better than most people. The attorneys are confused by the tax stuff. Tax people are confused by the law stuff, but I can read both. I read Greek and Hebrew and I can translate it to English. Let's do this. Okay. And so I was able to create videos and content and explain things to our clients. And we didn't even charge a premium, we just charged a very fair value price to, hey, we're going to knock this out for you. We're going to make sure it is in regulation with this and we're going to create everyone and funnel you through a process to assess your situation and create a best case scenario for you. I knew when I applied that to my client situation, especially with the personnel that I put in place, our clients were going to be successful, we were going to increase revenue, we were going to be successful. But what I didn't realize is that they would tell all their buddies about it. It and all of their buddies came knocking at the door and I had to 3x my employees to, to go handle all of this stuff. And revenue quadrupled in that time because I knew I was going to be successful, but I didn't know everybody's going to run and tell their friends about us. And so that was a beautiful vision for us where I set small actionable goals. I said, I need a goal that I can win right now. In this week, I'm going to read these 700 pages of law by the end of the week. Boom. Goal number two. By next week, I'm going to turn all this law into an actionable auto calculator and I'm going to produce it. Goal three. Now I'm going to teach three people how to use this calculator. Boom. Now we're going to run our first 30 clients, 10 people each, through these calculators. I'm going to review, make sure everything's good. Good. Now floodgates are open, tell everybody, funnel them through the process. Go. Boom. And we're able to help people save their businesses, save their homes, and save their families during COVID because they had true, accurate, non fraudulent access to the funds they were entitled to. And that that was a really, really good time for us.
[00:51:52] Speaker A: Congratulations. Just think about all the families that you impacted. Congratulations. That's awesome. And you know, Ryan, I appreciate all the tips, all the things that you have shared with the audience today. I really believe that these are things that are going to help all of us. Us. All of us, business owners, leaders, people in general, because you even talked about what we needed to do personally. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. I always enjoy having you. And I gotta have more, Ryan, so we gotta have you back later. But thank you so much for joining us on Ignite. For those of you who are here with us, don't forget to join in next week. We're excited that you came and that you spent time with us.
[00:52:37] Speaker B: Us.
[00:52:38] Speaker A: Because the one thing we do is always light the fire to keep it burning. See you next time.
[00:52:46] Speaker C: This has been a NOW Media Network's feature presentation. All rights reserved.
